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Monday, January 22, 2007




I had a bad dream today and I started sobbing myself awake.
Dreamt I lost someone very impt and dear to me.
The heartache of losing someone in the dream feels just so real.
After saying 'wah heng ah' when I opened my eyes, I said a short prayer and went back to sleep.

I guess everyone has a common fear in us and that is to lose someone very dear to us.
I've lost 2- my grandparents and so I know exactly how it feels to lose a person whom you really wanna keep and then hold her beside you forever.
Even at young age, nobody has to tell us that the weird feeling of your heart and chest being squeezed and the sour feeling that comes when you try to breathe are the signs of heartache.
It comes naturally.
Dun think anyone needs a teacher when it comes to heart matters.

I always get dreams of this sorts and it scares me.
It's like an omen telling me something is gonna happen which I hope never will.
and whenever I get emotional and sad over such things,
I'll think of this phrase from a song
越是幸福越害怕　怕它会結束

Then the whole world is gonna start preaching and tell me not to be pessimistic
and as usual, telling me to treasure the people ard me.
But it's not as easy as it seems , you know.
Afterall this is one fear that none of us can overcome that easily.

I've thought abt it actually,
the fear of losing is more than the fear of not winnning.
Contradictary yeh? but it does make sense.

If I have a choice,
I'd rather not win anything in life, and then not lose anyone around me.

but that's not very realistic isn't it.

Anyway, I think you'll choose the same thing too,
won't you?

Goodnight =)

csy♥
10:13 PM

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